Dr. Beardlove: Or How I learned to Stop Worrying and Love Prognostication

Bellmen: Ring your bells, load your muskets, ride your horses, and warn the British. The republican primaries are coming, and it is time to prognosticate.

Iowa had a little event at the state fair yesterday, and a few blowhards blew. Perhaps drawn by the lure of fried butter, or piqued by the shallowness of the republican pool, Perry is expected to officially throw his 10-gallon into the deep end a little later tonight.

I couldn't help but notice we're not talking about it.

My observations? A Texas candidate is nothing without Rove. I don't think Rick Perry's pray and wait strategy will play where it counts, mainly the important north-east and mid-west primary states. He should also be easily overcome if the actual Texas books are scrutinized. (And I don't mean our text books). The cooked books and fudged numbers that won him a few elections out here will definitely come to light (if not in the primaries then in the general election). As weird as it is, I just don't see how Romney should be worried about Perry's entry.

That said, I can't wait for Perry to enter the debates.


  1. Maybe Perry has a mini-Rove?

  2. Rove was already a mini-Rove. It'd have to be a Micro-Mini-Rove.

  3. Sounds like an oven.

  4. The only reason for Romney to be worried about Perry is if republican primary participants dislike him as much as media reports like to claim. If they find Romney too robotic, or too mormon, or too liberal, or not enough batshit crazy, or whatever, then maybe he has cause to worry. But Perry isn't the reason.

    It also occurs to me that republican primary participants may not give two shits about whether a candidate is electable in a general election. I certainly don't think Bachmann, Paul, Perry, Santorum, Cain, or Gingrich is, but people still seem able to be convinced to at least throw money at (most of) them.

  5. Just heard Harold Cain quoted the Pokemon movie in the debate last night. THIS IS GONNA BE SO AWESOME!

  6. I predict Bachmann will not get the Republican nomination, but will continue to run as a 3rd party candidate on a platform of tunneling under the wall separating church and state.

  7. Romney shouldn't be worried. Bachmann should be worried.


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